Thereupon These Errors Are Arose

"Speak the speech I pray you as I pronounced it to you,
trippingly on the tongue; Oh, it offends me to the soul to hear a robustious
periwig-pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to very rags, to split
the ears of the groundlings, who for the most part are capable of
nothing but inexplicable dumb-shows and noise— it out-Herods Herod.
Pray you avoid it. Be not too tame neither, but let your own discretion be your
tutor. Suit the action to the word, the word to the action, with this
special observance, that you o'erstep not the modesty of nature."

-Hamlet, Act 3 Scene II

Ah yes, the beauty of the repertory! The ever-changing carousel of performances, each actor shifting from star to supernumerary, villain to vanquishing hero and back again inside twenty-four hours. By this point we have gotten rather good at this, and now that there are no more rehearsals, we are living the charmed life of professional actors. A show at 2:00, dinner break, show at 7:30, have a drink and a sleep-in afterwards, do it all again the next day. And since we are all so amazingly good at this, what could possibly go wrong . . .?
I will dilate at full on this particular subject, the ins and outs of what can, does, and will go wrong in every show presently. But first . . . let me regale you with some festive frivolities:

A Gathering to Warm the House
OR
The Backyard Barbecue Bonanza

At this point in the season, one would think there was no way to outdo the Day-Off Parties that had thus far transpired. Indeed the competition was stiff, but narrow odds did never scare off the indomitable Dennis Price! He and his lovely wife Molly have recently bought their first house in Maine, and had been waiting for just the right opportunity to throw a housewarming party. As the company manager for the season, Dennis has the charge of keeping all of us in tact, healthy, happy and informed at all times. Its a job he does very well, and so it was no surprise that since he knows exactly how to take care of a group of rowdy actors, he also knew precisely how to show all of us a very good time.

Upon arrival at the Price's lovely home, we were greeted by a garage full of savory delicacies. There was a sprawling plot of land out back with fruit orchards and green fields, set on a backdrop of woodlands. Two kegs in the garage and a live band setup out back especially for the occasion, made it a festive afternoon indeed. In case any of us got bored (not likely) there was soccer and beer pong and horseshoes and all manner of other diversions. And there was certainly no way for any of us to complain of hunger, as each new arrival at the shindig brought yet another dish to taste. There was literally food coming in every fifteen minutes for a number of hours. We ate and ate and ate until there was no more room in any of us . . . and then we ate some more!Highlights were the vegetable quinoa medley, the incredible cream-cheese-stuffed-bacon-wrapped-jalapeno-poppers, and the blueberry cheesecake--easily the best cheesecake I've ever had.

It was a relaxed vibe all afternoon, with everyone digging the music and feasting. Thanks to Molly and Dennis for a great day!


Then it was back to business on Tuesday. We had a full week of performances, two per day from Tuesday to Sunday. And as I mentioned before, they were certainly not without their ups and downs. It always starts with little slip ups; the kind of thing the audience is rarely aware of. For instance, in Misalliance last week, Sheila changed her daughter's name:

Text: "Hypatia ought to have her character cleared!"

Spoken: "PATRICIA ought to have her character cleared!"

. . . Okay, not too far off, but we on stage noticed. But that was the least of the textual discrepancies. In the same show (which we had not performed in 8 days, so give us a break!) Mike blanked on a line and came up with this:

Text: "I knew a chap named Joey Percival at Oxford. He was a most awfully clever fellow, and so nice too!"
Spoken: "I knew a chap named Joey Percival at Oxford. He was . . . . . SO TALL . . . and, nice too."
. . . not exactly Shaw, but certainly true to life. Its also interesting how the plays feed into each other. For instance in Canterville Ghost, I have the line:

Text: "Agreed this 20th day of May, 1910"

and that night in Misalliance, I have the following line:

Text: " . . . hereby voluntarily confess that on the 31st of May 1909, I . . . "

This is completely unfair. Needless to say I don't always get these right. One night in Misalliance

I declared:
" . . . hereby voluntarily confess that on this 20th day of May 1910."

And once I said it realized I was in the wrong play. Luckily for me, the ever perceptive James Smith III picked up on it, and when he re-read the letter later in the scene, adjusted the date and year so that I did not look like a fool. Thanks James.

But its not always textual inconsistencies. Sometimes, especially when the action gets heated on stage, all manner of mishaps take place. Like last week when we were in the final moments of Misalliance, and instead of merely grabbing Gene's shoulders and holding him back, I accidently kneed him in the balls. To his credit he did not even flinch or budge. But I certainly heard about it after the show.

Or in Comedy of Errors, one night last week Mark had his flub:

Text: "Well Syracusian, say in brief the cause why thou departest thy native home and on what cause thou camest to Ephesus."

Spoken: "Well Syracusian say in brief the cause why thou departest thy native EPHESUS and on what cause thou camest . . . to . . . Ephesus?"
. . . oh well! Keep going. :)

But by far the best line send up so far this season must be claimed by Maarouf. At the top of Comedy of Errors last week, he was supposed to deliver the following:

Text: "I am invited sir, to certain merchants of whom I hope to make much benefit. I crave your pardon. Soon, at five o'clock, please you, I will meet with you upon the mart and there consort you till bedtime. My present business calls me now. Sir, I commend you to your own content."

But all that came out was:

"I . . . have a business meeting. I must leave you now."

Right. Well Shakespeare did say that brevity was the soul of wit.

And at least Maarouf was able to speak his subtext. It just goes to show that even though we do speak the words every show, they are not always the same words. And that, of course, is part of the beauty of the theater.

And every so often, one of us re-writes some dialog or lyric without even being aware of it. We were singing "Under the Boardwalk" at intermission during Comedy of Errors, and Maya has the following line:

Text: "Oh when the sun beats down, and burns the tar up on the roof . . ."

But all of us on stage swear we heard her say:

Spoken: "Oh when the sun beats down and burns the tar on Maarouf . . ."

I guess Freud was right, sometimes we don't even know what we are saying.

The highlight of last week for me though was having my father come to visit. He arrived Friday afternoon and stayed over the weekend to see all five shows from Friday night till Sunday night. He became a local fixture here, and got on very well with the whole company. After each show, dad would stick around and watch us change the set over, and then we would go hang out a bit before he headed back to his hotel. Sunday, my aunt and uncle came in from New Hampshire. They had never seen me perform so it was great for them to be able to see The Canterville Ghost. We had a lovely afternoon including lunch at the Liberal Cup afterwards.

So despite some occasional ups and downs its been a wonderful week full of shows. And like Mama Gump used to say: "you never know what you're gonna get". True enough. I'll be back next week with one final installment of this summer blog. But I must leave you now:

I have a business meeting,

BBell